2019 Musings

Screenshot 2020-01-08 at 10.34.33 AM

2019 was so different from the previous years yet it feels home. From being engaged last October during my birthday to marrying the love of my life soon. It feels like a tidal wave of emotion in my subtle and calm sea, it’s refreshing.

I spent my entire 20’s mostly alone and frankly, enjoyed a decade of singlehood — from traveling solo in different parts of Philippines, watching independent films and documentaries in my room, going to music festivals and just laying down on bed during weekends. Cherished my season of solitude and learned that before anyone else, love yourself first. Then seek divine servitude, be a vessel of His words. There is calmness knowing that there is enough of God’s grace in our lifetime.

I felt complete and didn’t need anyone to fill a void. And, I think that’s how I will describe my relationship with Raph, he didn’t complete me, he complements me. He made me realized the importance of planning, writing down all the the things you need to do in a week, month or even in a year — long-term goals. Grocery items list? Check! Things to do tomorrow? Check!

I look at Raph and see a lot of potential – how we are different yet I am learning a lot from him, discussing our common goals and making it all work for us.

Cheering me during quarter-end, listening to my rants on repeat, cooking meals for me (Bonus point: Raph cooks so well! You have to taste his sinigang!), taking care of me for when I am careless. We are two different individuals, adding extra happiness to each other’s lives.

Here we are shaping our future, one achieved goal at a time and I am looking forward on what more can we achieve together. With the same values, I feel in my spirit, wherever life throws us, we will thrive. The universe just have to throw the seeds of opportunities and we will find our roots intact, grow in grace and bear fruits of our labor. There is confidence on this because I know Jesus is the center of it all.

I pray that Jesus will blanket us in His divine guidance, to be more selfless, to be more understanding, to be more for each other. It’s true, you only need one big fight to know a person. It’s not going to be perfect but I trust Raph and that our love will sustain until we are old and grey. I am entrusting my life with him because I know Raph is a good person.

More than anything else, he is a good son. I have been to his hometown twice this year, bonded with his sister often in KL and met his brothers in Canada and observed how he is with his family — how his family describes Raph. This is the man I want to marry, someone responsible, someone who doesn’t wait for anyone to say what to do, someone who checks on his parents all the time, someone who reminds me to check on my parents and siblings, someone who values real long-term friends and sige na nga, someone gwapo (naks naman!)

Sige na ngaaa, I have been smitten by how he looks, a dashing tall guy with cute eyelids and smile, cheekbones rising more on the right side on the face. Sabi nga nila, bonus nalang yung looks. He’s beautiful inside and out. Thank you po Lord sa bonus!!! Haha

I started my 2019 on a rooftop under the NY fireworks catching glances with Raph and ended the year, holding hands with him in a buffet table (lol, hilig po natin sa buffet this year haha)

โ™กย ย I will eat the edges of your sandwiches, Tala dance cover with you in any parking space, sing duets with you mala-Sarah & Matteo levels, plan our lives in an excel file and hug you when it gets too cold. To more decades with you โ™ก

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s